transition

suddenly i am here alone in my house. things have come and gone so quickly.
christmas, food, wine, chocolate, my amazing brother and his amazing girlfriend. suddenly gone.
soon it will be 2007, new years eve will have come and gone.
so many things have come out from lurking behind doors, windows, dark spaces, far away memories. lots of things to think about. even more things to do it seems. but i am on holidays. my book is waiting. the beach is waiting. and nothing is waiting.
i have never really thought about christmas very much. its always been there. its always been a day to hang out, no dramas like everyone else seems to have. but this year seems to have brought out some sort of strangeness. i feel it on my back. the pressure of wanting everyone to be happy to be together. the misunderstanding of tiredness as unhappiness. the misunderstanding of busy as not wanting to. strangeness but no less love.

now there is so much time.
time for travel agents.
time for getting bronzed and salty.
time for running.
time for writing.
time for making.
time for getting excited.